Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
