Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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