the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
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