Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
