I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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