For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
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Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
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extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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