A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
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