Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize