Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize