Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
