Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize