I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
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He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
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Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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