Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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