yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize