I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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