I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize