we're chasing vodka with high fives
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
you never un-have a 4some
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
