Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
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