I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
