Well apparently he's into motor boating.
shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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