I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
