either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Randomize
