There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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