Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
