I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
