If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
