You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i will never coherently bang her
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
