woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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