Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
