This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I've blown a few things in my day
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
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