He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
