I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize