True but thats because hes a fetus.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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