My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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