just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
