White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
