For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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