The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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