How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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