my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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