Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
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