I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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