I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
