I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
