If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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