i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Randomize