Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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