I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
