? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Randomize
