Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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